Trusting the ‘river of life’

A colleague, Justin, told me that he decided to leave his job and strike out on his own. “How did you reach that decision?” I asked. It appeared risky, as he has a young son. He replied, “As I’ve meditated on questions about my work, I’ve been connecting deeply with the river of life and I remembered that it’s for us. I was open to the creative ideas that arose from those meditations. Opportunities started to appear and I gave my notice.”

Speaking with Justin reminded me of an experience I had 12 years ago when I moved to Chicago from Denver to work on my book Gifts From our Grandmothers. My close friend, Karyn, lived there and was also working on a book. We planned to support each other in the completion of our books.

One Sunday, while attending a natural healing festival with a new friend, Saretta, she said,” You should have a session with Martin.” Saretta loved working with Martin. I’d encountered Martin at events like this before but never worked with him because, frankly, he looked a little odd. He always wore black, a white priest-like collar and a large wooden cross around his neck. He wasn’t an ordained minister. I guess he just liked the look.

For some reason when Saretta made that suggestion that day, I went up to Martin and requested a session.

Martin explained his hands-on energy work and said to tell him if I saw any images or colors. Oh, no,the performance anxiety— What if I don’t see anything? What if nothing extraordinary happens in the session? Did that mean that I failed?

No images or colors appeared until Martin commented that we were almost done. When he said that, my performance anxiety vanished, and I did ‘see’ something. A large wooden hand appeared in my mind’s eye. I felt a rush of emotion as I instinctively reached my hand out and placed it in that hand. I felt safe and deeply loved without knowing that I’d previously felt unsafe or unloved.

That feeling stayed with me when I found out later that night that I needed to move to a new place within a week. The transition to the new living situation went smoothly.

Karyn and I did finish our books that year and I headed back to Denver.

When I get anxious, in over-think and over-control mode, I forget about that river that runs through my life that I can trust. Sometimes I connect with it in my daily meditation but seldom with the depth that I experienced with Martin.

The affirmation I’m working with is—All that remains is trust; the knowledge that all events in life arise from the endless love of the universe and offer the opportunity for learning and recognition.

I’m grateful to Justin for that wonderful reminder about trust and connection to the wisdom within.

How do you stay connected to that place of trusting the ‘river of life?’